changes

i'm not really sure what to make of certain situations.... i just know that mutual indecision sucks. people hear what they want to hear and act accordingly.... sometimes you can't control what comes out of their mouth, and definitely not how they make you feel. not everyone understands that how you approach problems affects how they are resolved, regardless of how intuitive the solutions should, or ought, to be.

i've been having a recurring image play itself over and over in my head. certain songs bring me back to this scene... josh groban, opera. new york city, in the winter - trees burdened heavily with snow, it is cold and dark, and i am alone. i hear the rich notes of a symphony wafting faintly to where i stand - a park, bordered with tall pines. i am staring, entranced, at the origin of the music, a cathedral door's edges illuminated softly by the light within. and i feel a tinge of excitement, a new spiritual high... unencumbered by mundane worries and worldly possessions. it is cathartic. i feel that i have reached a stable point; one in which security, love, and happiness have finally found balance in my life. i feel at peace.